Top 50 Basketball Jokes

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  1. Basketball Jokes for March Madness: A grandson was visiting his grandfather at the nursing home. When the boy walked into the room, the grandfather smiled. The boy enthusiastically said, “Grandpa you have March Madness teeth! You are down to your Final Four!” (Final Four Jokes & Grandparent Jokes)
  2. Hanging in the hallway at the college are the basketball team pictures from the past 40 years. A player in the center of the front row in each picture holds a basketball identifying the year — “62-63,” “63-64,” “64-65,” etc.  One day I spotted a freshman looking curiously at the photos. Turning to me, he said, “Isn’t it strange how the teams always lost by one point?”
  3. Who is the geography teacher’s favorite NBA player of all-time?… Jerry West. (Geography Jokes)
  4. They always asked me if I play basketball because I was tall… They stopped asking me that when I asked them if they play mini-golf.
  5. Duke students have trouble spelling “Krzyzewski.” UNC students have trouble spelling “Smith.” (North Carolina Jokes & Grammar Jokes)
  6. What rapper has a sweet looking basketball jump shot?… LL Cool J! (365 Music Jokes)
  7. Christmas Basketball Jokes: What is Santa’s favorite basketball play?… the give and “GO GO GO!” (Christmas Basketball Jokes)
  8. What do Karl Malone, Santa Claus, and the mailman have in common?… They always deliver. (Mailman Jokes & Super Bowl Jokes)
  9. What famous Southern Rock anthem is the same as the Boston Celtics offense during the 1980s… Free Bird. (Massachusetts Jokes)
  10. They’re a basketball team in transition… They’re going from bad to worse.
  11. Did you know Steven Spielberg and John Williams like to play basketball together? … He shoots, he scores. (Movie Jokes & Music Jokes)
  12. What’s a pirate’s favorite basketball move?… Jump hook. (Pirate Jokes)
  13. What is a heart surgeon’s favorite basketball team of all time?… 1983 N.C. State NCAA Champions – the Cardiac Pack. (College Basketball Jokes)
  14. Who is the best Star Wars character at basketball?… Kobe Wan Kenobi. (Star Wars Jokes & Obi Wan Kenobi Jokes)
  15. Why did the basketball team change their name to the Possums?… Because they play dead at home and they get killed on the road.
  16. Willis Reed, NBA Hall-of-Famer, would be a great spokesperson for National Book Day. (Book Jokes)
  17. Offensively, James Harden is outstanding… Defensively, he’s just out standing.
  18. Basketball Pun: I’m not trying to Curry favor, but these puns are Golden, State your opinion.
  19. I’m starting a group to play basketball and then discuss philosophy… It’s called “shoot first, ask questions later.”
  20. Basketball Pun: The man walking through the airport with a basketball… must’ve been traveling.
  21. Our basketball coach loves dogs… he has three-point setters.
  22. College Basketball Jokes: When Austin Peay University had a player named Fly Williams, the students would chant, “The Fly is open! Let’s go Peay!”
  23. Basketball Jokes for New Year’s Day: What New Year’s resolution should a basketball player never make?… To travel more.
  24. Why was Rudolph the Reindeer ineligible for his college basketball team?… He went down in history (from an 82 to a 67). (Reindeer Jokes & World’s Best Basketball Jokes)
  25. What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops?… Swiss! (Cheese Jokes)
  26. Why would Hall of Fame Coach Dean Smith love to have at least 5 anti-vax basketball players for his Four Corners offense. …. they never take any shots. (North Carolina Jokes)
  27. What is the worst basketball warm-up song?… Another brick in the wall. (365 Music Jokes)
  28. Basketball Jokes for Father’s Day: What is Jason Tatum’s favorite Beach Boys song?…. Little Deuce Coupe. (365 Music Jokes)
  29. NBA Jokes: What is Coach Popovich’s favorite play?… Pick and Pop.
  30. Why are college basketball coaches so excited to make it to the 15th hole in golf?… They love the final fore. (Golf Jokes)
  31. The anti-vax basketball team lost every game they played…. Apparently, they never take any shots. (Covid Jokes)
  32. Why did the basketball player always use the pay phone?… He loved dropping dimes.
  33. What do you call a college basketball player that misses dunks?… Alley Whoops.
  34. What kind of toothpaste does Derrick White use?… Crest 3D White. (Boston Celtics Jokes)
  35. If a basketball player gets athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get…  Missile Toe! (Astronomy Jokes)
  36. Did you know a bunch of retired Indiana basketball players put a team together?… They are called the Indiana Pacemakers. (Indiana Jokes)
  37. Basketball Pun: I used to be addicted to college basketball… but I rebounded.
  38. What song does The Basketball Tournament HATE?… The Final Countdown by Europe. (365 Music Jokes)
  39. What did the genie grant the basketball player?… Three swishes!
  40. Basketball Pun: A layup… You can bank on that shot
  41. Basketball Pun: “Let’s not get too defensive here.” basketball coach up 20 points.
  42. Did you hear about the ghost basketball team?… They can’t shoot or defend, but the have a lot of spirit. (Ghost Jokes)
  43. Basketball Pun: Dunkin’ ain’t just for donuts!
  44. Why did the basketball player go to art school?… Because he wanted to learn how to draw fouls!
  45. Basketball stars don’t pass away – they just crossover. (Cemetery Jokes)
  46. What is Red Auerbach’s favorite Pink Floyd song?… Have a cigar. (365 Music Jokes)
  47. What do you call a basketball player who’s always happy?… A court jester!
  48. Basketball Pun: I’m going to take a shot at a basketball pun.
  49. What is a basketball player’s favorite thing about astronomy?… Shooting stars. (Astronomy Jokes)
  50. What college basketball team is the favorite of Dr. Seuss?… The Indiana “Who” siers. (Dr. Seuss Jokes & Indiana Jokes)