College Basketball Jokes

Youthbasketball123 is a website designed to provide ideas, drills, books, teaching tools, guest blogs and so much more for basketball coaches, players, and parents.

Google Search “College Basketball Jokes”

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best college basketball jokes.
  2. What is a great warm-up song for a basketball team?… Shoot to Thrill by AC/DC. (365 Music Jokes)
  3. Why was Rudolph the Reindeer ineligible for his college basketball team?… His grade went down in history. (Reindeer Jokes & World’s Best Basketball Jokes)
  4. What legendary college basketball would be a great major league baseball pitcher?… Coach K! (Baseball Jokes)
  5. They’re a college basketball team in transition… They’re going from bad to worse.
  6. Why do college basketball players love Oreo cookies?… Because they can dunk them! (Oreo Cookie Jokes)
  7. What do an angry bunny and the college basketball Slam Dunk basketball player have in common?… Mad hops.
  8. Why did the college basketball player visit the bank?… His checks were all bouncing.
  9. If the pilgrims came on the Mayflower then what does the Division I college basketball player come on?… The scholar ships. (Thanksgiving Jokes & Pilgrim Jokes)
  10. Why can’t college basketball players go on vacation?… They aren’t allowed to travel.
  11. Why is basketball the grossest college sport?… Because they dribble all over the court. 
  12. Why did the college basketball player go to jail?…  Because he shot the ball! (Police Jokes)
  13. What’s a pirate’s favorite college basketball team?… Seton Hall Pirates. (Pirate Jokes)
  14. What is a college basketball player’s favorite Christmas song?… “Oh Christmas Three, Oh Christmas Three!” (Christmas Tree Jokes & Music Jokes)
  15. What legendary college basketball would be an awful major league baseball hitter?… Coach K! (Baseball Jokes)
  16. What is a sad, sad, college basketball team?… The Duke Blue Devils. (Psychology Jokes)
  17. Which fast-food chain would be a good college basketball player?… Dunkin’ Donuts. (Donut Jokes)
  18. Who is the best choice of a musical artist to sing the National Anthem at a college basketball game on Christmas Day?… A “wreath” a Franklin. (Christmas Wreath Jokes)
  19. Who is the best choice of a musical artist to sing the National Anthem at college basketball game during the Christmas season?… A “wreath” a Franklin. (Christmas Wreath Jokes)
  20. What kind of stories are told by college basketball players?…. Tall Tales.
  21. What do college basketball cheerleaders drink before they go to a basketball game?… Root beer! (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  22. What’s the difference between a college basketball player who is a ball hog and time?… Time passes. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  23. Why aren’t burgers too good at college basketball?… Too many turnovers! (Hamburger Jokes)
  24. The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the freshman class.  Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?”  A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, “A college basketball coach?” (Top Psychology Jokes)
  25. Why did the college basketball player visit the bank?… His checks were all bouncing.
  26. What did the March say to all the madness?… What’s all that bracket. (March Madness Quotes & Top 25 Jimmy V Quotes)
  27. “He’s great on the court,” a sportswriter said of a college basketball player in an interview with his coach. “But’s how’s his scholastic work?” “Why, he makes straight A’s,” replied the coach. “Wonderful!” said the sportswriter. “Yes,” agreed the coach, “but his B’s are a little crooked.” (365 School Jokes)
  28. What’s an eggs favorite college basketball team?… University of Yokelahomia. (Egg Jokes Oklahoma Jokes)
  29. Why do the UCLA basketball have to drink their coffee black?… Because KAREEM has graduated. (Coffee Jokes)
  30. If a college basketball players gets athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get?… Missile Toe. (Top Astronomy Jokes)
  31. What’s the difference between a dog and a college basketball player?… One drools, the other dribbles.
  32. Did you hear about the college basketball team that doesn’t have a website?… They can’t string three “Ws” together. (Computer Jokes)
  33. My college graduation was held inside the basketball arena and man was it hot…. It must have been like 5,000 degrees in there. (Graduation Jokes)
  34. A first-grade teacher can’t believe her student isn’t hyped up about the Super Bowl. “It’s a huge event. Why aren’t you excited?” “Because I’m not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too,” says the student. “Well, that’s a lousy reason,” says the teacher. “What if your parents were morons? What would you be then?” “Then I’d be a football fan.” (Jokes for Teachers & Super Bowl Jokes)
  35. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about college basketball?
  36. What do the winning Super Bowl team, the #1 player on your college team, and the mailman have in common?… They always deliver. (Mailman Jokes & Super Bowl Jokes)
  37. Why is a scrambled egg like a losing college basketball team?… Because they both have been beaten. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  38. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good
  39. college basketball knock-knock joke?
  40. What did the triangle offense say to the ball?… “You’re pointless.” (Geometry Jokes)
  41. Why are college basketball players messy eaters?… They’re always dribbling. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  42. In what sport is a basket filled but never gets full?… College basketball. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  43. Who was the poet of college basketball?… Longfellow.
  44. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good college basketball knock knock jokes? (June Jokes Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
  45. What’s one of an eggs favorite basketball team?… Yokelahomia State. (Egg Jokes Oklahoma Jokes)
  46. If a college basketball team were chasing a college baseball team, what time would it be?… Five after nine. (9:05) (Top Baseball Jokes & Top Sports Jokes)
  47. Why couldn’t the college basketball player listen to his music?… Because he broke a record!
  48. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Woo… Woo, who?… What are you cheering for in college basketball? 
  49. Why do college basketball players love cookies?… Because they can dunk them! (Cookie Jokes)
  50. What’s a pirate’s favorite college basketball move?… Jump hook. (Pirate Jokes)
  51. College basketball sued tennis for no reason… Now they have to go to court!
  52. They’re a college basketball team in transition… They’re going from bad to worse.
  53. What New Year’s resolution should a college basketball player never make?… To travel more. (Travel Guest Blogs Basketball Jokes)
  54. Why did the college basketball player sit on the sideline and sketch pictures of chickens?… He was trying to draw fowls / fouls. (Chicken Jokes)
  55. What did the University of Delaware players wear to the basketball game?… Idaho, Alaska. Maybe a New Jersey. (Top 50 State Jokes)
  56. Why can’t you play college basketball with pigs?… They hog the ball. (Pig Jokes)
  57. Why was Cinderella such a bad college basketball player?… Her coach was a pumpkin. (Top Holiday Jokes & Top Halloween Jokes)
  58. Why can’t you get a fairly officiated college basketball game in the jungle?… They are all cheetahs. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  59. What do you call a pig who never passes playing college basketball?… A ball hog.
  60. Why can’t college basketball players go on vacation?… They aren’t allowed to travel.
  61. Why can’t college basketball players go on Spring Break?… They aren’t allowed to travel.
  62. Why can’t college basketball players go on semester break?… They aren’t allowed to travel.
  63. Where is a college basketball player’s favorite place to eat?… Dunkin’ Donuts.
  64. What do you do when you see an elephant with a basketball?… Get out of the way. Why don’t college basketball players don’t like to leave their hometown?… They hate traveling so much.
  65. What do you call the basketball move where you drink too much alcohol and score? Slam Drunk!
  66. What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
  67. My dad is really good at basketball. He always told me, “I’ve been Duncan all my life.”
  68. I invited my flat-earther friend to play basketball. He brought a frisbee with him.
  69. Why did the fish refuse to play basketball? He was afraid of the net.
  70. Which fast-food chain would be a good basketball player? Dunkin’ Donuts.
  71. What’s the difference between Basketball players and Soccer players? Basketball players get actual injuries.
  72. If a jockey wears jockey shorts, and a basketball player wears basketball shorts, what kind of shorts does the President wear? Depends.
  73. Why hasn’t Europe ever won Olympic gold in basketball? Because Europe isn’t a country.
  74. What do you call a shark that plays basketball? A Sharq.
  75. Why does Jesus get nervous when playing basketball? He’s afraid of getting crossed up.
  76. What do an angry bunny and a pro basketball player have in common? Mad hops. They always asked me if I play basketball because I was tall. They stopped asking me that when I asked them if they play mini-golf.
  77. The blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court… The game would be canceled.
  78. I used to be addicted to college basketball, but I rebounded.
  79. How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb?… Only one. But he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.
  80. Why are college basketball players messy eaters?… They’re always dribbling.
  81. Why are frogs so good at college basketball?… Because they always make jump shots.
  82. What did the triangle offense say to the ball?… “You’re pointless.”
  83. What does a college basketball player do when he loses his eyesight?… Become a referee.
  84. What’s the difference between the college basketball player and a dollar bill?… You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
  85. Which are the best animals in college basketball?… A score-pion.
  86. Why can’t you play college basketball in the jungle?… Because there are too many cheetahs.
  87. Why is a college basketball referee like an angry chicken?… They both have foul mouths.
  88. Why is the college basketball arena hot after the game?… Because all the fans have left.
  89. What do you call a college basketball player that misses dunks?… Alley Whoops.
  90. What does a college basketball player say when he misses?… “Shoot.”
  91. What is the difference between a Duke fan and a baby?… The baby will stop whining after a while.
  92. Why did the college basketball player sit on the sideline and sketch pictures of chickens?… He was learning how to draw fowls.
  93. If a basketball player gets athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get?… Missile toe! What do you call an unbelievable story about a college basketball player?… A tall tale.
  94. What’s the difference between a dog and a basketball player?… One drools, the other dribbles.
  95. Why is a scrambled egg like a losing basketball team?… Because they both have been beaten.
  96. In what sport is a basket filled but never gets full?… Basketball.
  97. What do basketball cheerleaders drink before they go to a basketball game? Root beer!
  98. Why couldn’t the basketball player listen to his music? Because he broke a record!
  99. Why do basketball players love cookies? Because they can dunk them!
  100. Why didn’t the nose make the basketball team? He didn’t get picked.
  101. What does a hunter do with a basketball? He shoots it!
  102. How do basketball players stay cool during a game? They stand near the fans.
  103. If you were a basketball, I’d never shoot. Because I’d always miss you.
  104. What violation do ghosts get called for the most in basketball? Ghoul tending.
  105. What do you call a person who walks back and forth screaming one minute, then sits down weeping uncontrollably the next? A basketball coach.
  106. Why was the basketball court wet? Because people were dribbling on it!
  107. Why did people in the NBA think Michael Jordan was conceited? Because he was always putting on Airs.
  108. I’ve got a great idea for an NBA-themed fast-food restaurant. I call it Shake-Shaq.
  109. Did you hear about the referee that got fired from the NBA? Supposedly he’s a whistleblower.
  110. God and Satan arranged a basketball game between Heaven and Hell. “I know for a fact we are gonna win,” said God. “We have all the best players up here: Wilt Chamberlain, Moses Malone, Kobe Bryant, and so on.” “I wouldn’t count on that, God,” said Satan. “You see, down here, we have all the referees.”
  111. Just saw a fight between a basketball player and a YouTuber. Don’t listen to the media. The basketball player will win in the courts.
  112. Basketball sued tennis for no reason. Now they have to go to court.
  113. What is the urologist’s favorite part in basketball? The dribbles.
  114. My tennis career has taught me I can be the best basketball player ever. Nothing but net.
  115. Did you know Steven Spielberg and John Williams like to play basketball together? He shoots, he scores.
  116. Did you hear about that bloody hilarious basketball team? The Hemoglobetrotters?
  117. How did the guy with no hair do during his basketball game? Oh, he bald.
  118. Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players? They dribble all the time.
  119. I couldn’t figure out why the basketball kept getting larger and larger. Then it hit me.
  120. The anti-vax basketball team lost every game this season. Apparently they never take any shots.
  121. Why can’t dinosaurs play basketball? Because they are dead.
  122. Basketball players are the most upstanding members of society. They really are people to look up to.
  123. Been watching basketball lately, and I gotta say I can hardly tolerate Kevin Durant. He stinks compared to his brother, Deo.
  124. Why did the basketball team join a craft club? Because they wanted to learn how to make baskets!
  125. I was going to pass it to you… But the hoop was open first.
  126. What’s the difference between the New York Knicks and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
  127. What do you call a shrimp that’s really good at basketball? Leprawn James.
  128. Why can’t basketball players go on vacation? They aren’t allowed to travel.
  129. Basketball players are afraid of themselves. They don’t like great heights.
  130. A brawl took place in a basketball game. A judge came in and used his gavel to stop it. He brought order in the court.
  131. Did you hear about that new sci-fi basketball show? It’s called Hooper Natural.
  132. I couldn’t figure out why the basketball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then it hit me.
  133. Why don’t fish like basketball? They’re afraid of the nets.
  134. Why was Cinderella thrown off the college basketball team?… She ran away from the ball. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  135. What do you call an unbelievable story about a college basketball player?… A tall tale.
  136. How do college basketball players stay cool during a game?… They stand near the fans.
  137. How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb?… Only one. But he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.
  138. Hanging in the hallway at the college are the basketball team pictures from the past 40 years. A player in the center of the front row in each picture holds a basketball identifying the year — “62-63,” “63-64,” “64-65,” etc.  One day I spotted a freshman looking curiously at the photos. Turning to me, he said, “Isn’t it strange how the teams always lost by one point?”
  139. What basketball player would be a great spokesperson for autumn?… Taco Fall. (Taco Jokes)
  140. What do you call a groundhog that plays basketball?… A ball hog. (Groundhog Day Jokes)
  141. Why do basketball players love chocolate chip cookies?… Because they can dunk them! (Chocolate Chip Cookie Jokes & Coaching Youth Basketball)
  142. What New Year’s resolution should a high school basketball player never make?… To travel more. (Travel Guest Blogs Middle School Jokes)
  143. Golf is what you play when you’re too out of shape to play basketball.
  144. What’s an eggs favorite basketball team?… University of Central Yokelahomia. (Egg Jokes Oklahoma Jokes)
  145. Why is a baby good at college basketball?… Because they’re always dribbling.
  146. What is Rudolph’s favorite NBA basketball team?… The Milwaukee Bucks. (Christmas Jokes Wisconsin Jokes)
  147. Tennis sued college basketball for no reason… Now they have to go to court!
  148. What basketball player would be a great spokesperson for National Taco Day?… Tacko Fall. (Taco Jokes)
  149. Who is a worm’s favorite basketball player?… Dennis Rodman AKA “the worm.” (Worm Jokes)
  150. Yo mama so stupid she thought Dunkin Donuts was a college basketball team. (Top Coffee Jokes & Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  151. Why did the elephants stampede onto the basketball court?… They played for the Chargers.
  152. What is the favorite sport of a bass fish?… Bass-get-ball.
  153. What do you call a ninja who is good at basketball?… A Kobe Shinobi!
  154. What do you call a basketball player who smells really good?… Kevin Deodurant.
  155. If a college baseball team were chasing a college basketball team, what time would it be?… Nine after five. (9:05) (Top Baseball Jokes & Top Sports Jokes)
  156. Why did Ron Artest leave the game early?… He wanted to beat the crowd.
  157. How do you keep a Milwaukee Bucks player out of your yard? Put up a basketball net.
  158. What is Santa’s favorite basketball team? The New York Old St. Nicks.
  159. I hear that Mr. Worldwide often gets called out in basketball. He’s always trying to travel.
  160. How do you know when it’s LeBron James’ Birthday? Everyone gets to leave work 12 minutes early.
  161. What do you call a fantasy show about college basketball?… Hooper-natural.
  162. What’s the difference between the Miami Heats and a dollar bill?… You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
  163. What do you call 12 millionaires around a TV watching the NBA Finals? The Detroit Pistons.
  164. Why couldn’t the baby make a basket? Because he was always dribbling.

Youth Basketball Jokes

2 thoughts on “College Basketball Jokes

  1. Pingback: World’s Best Basketball Jokes – Youth Basketball 123

  2. Pingback: 365 Top Basketball Twitter Accounts: Basketball Account of the Day – Youth Basketball 123

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *