365 Funny Basketball Jokes

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November Jokes for Kids

  1. What month should you never ask to the coach youth basketball?… “NO” vember (November Jokes)
  2. What do a Thanksgiving turkey and a college basketball pep band have in common?… the drumsticks.
  3. What month should you never ask to do the basketball scorebook?… “NO” vember (November Jokes)
  4. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Gladys… Gladys who?…. Gladys the best list of basketball jokes for Thanksgiving. Aren’t you? (Thanksgiving Knock Knock Jokes)
  5. What month should you never ask to the work the clock at a basketball game?… “NO” vember. (Labor Day Jokes & November Jokes)
  6. If the Pilgrims were alive today AND played basketball, what would they be most famous for?… Their AGE! (Grandparents Jokes)
  7. What’s the best dance to do at a Thanksgiving basketball game?… The turkey trot! (Turkey Jokes)
  8. November 8th Election Day: If a jockey wears jockey shorts, and a basketball player wears basketball shorts, what kind of shorts does the President wear?… Depends.
  9. What band is great to listen to before a Thanksgiving family basketball game?… The Cranberries! 
  10. What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to before playing a basketball game?… Plymouth Rock! (Music Jokes & Pilgrim Jokes)
  11. November 11th: Veterans Day Jokes: Why was David Robinson arrested on Veterans Day?… He shot the basketball.
  12. Which English pop singer is would be a good choice to sing the national anthem around Thanksgiving?… Pumpkin Spice. (Pumpkin Jokes)
  13. If the pilgrims came on the Mayflower, then what does the Division I college basketball player come on?… The scholar ships. (Thanksgiving Jokes Pilgrim Jokes)
  14. What is the #1 defensive play for Thanksgiving?… The “stuff!”
  15. What’s the key to a great Thanksgiving basketball game?… The turKEY (Turkey Jokes)
  16. What sound does a limping turkey make after a sprained ankle at a basketball game?…“Wobble, wobble!” (Turkey Jokes)
  17. My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving basketball jokes … … but I told them I couldn’t quit “cold turkey.”
  18. What is a Pilgrim’s favorite basketball move?… The “stuff!”
  19. What do you wear to a Thanksgiving basketball game?… A Har – VEST. (Fall Jokes)
  20. I wasn’t going to play basketball on Thanksgiving, but my mom promised to make me Eggs Benedict. So I’m going home for the hollandaise. (Egg Jokes & Thanksgiving Jokes)
  21. Why can’t you take a turkey to a basketball game?… Because they use such FOWL language. (Turkey Jokes)
  22. What happened when the turkey got into a fight at the basketball game?… He got the stuffing knocked out of him! (Turkey Jokes Boxing Jokes)
  23. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Woo… Woo, who?… What are you cheering for this college basketball season? (Knock Knock Basketball Jokes)
  24. Thanksgiving Basketball Jokes: Why can’t college basketball players go home for Thanksgiving break?… They aren’t allowed to travel. (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  25. Black Friday Basketball Jokes: I’m going to spend a thousand dollars for a new basketball hoop on Black Friday… It’s going to be grand. (Computer Jokes)

December Jokes for Kids

  1. Christmas Basketball Jokes: What is a basketball player’s favorite Christmas song?… “Oh Christmas Three, Oh Christmas Three!” (Christmas Tree Jokes & Music Jokes)
  2. What is Santa’s favorite NBA basketball team?… The Milwaukee Bucks. (Christmas Jokes Wisconsin Jokes)
  3. Why can’t college basketball players go on Christmas vacation?… They aren’t allowed to travel.
  4. If a basketball player gets athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get…  Missile Toe! (Astronomy Jokes)
  5. What version of the National Anthem is most popular in high school gyms before a basketball during the Christmas season?… A “wreath” a Franklin. (Christmas Wreath Jokes & Live NFL Performance)
  6. What is a basketball coach’s favorite Christmas song?… “Oh Christmas Three, Oh Christmas Three!” (Christmas Tree Jokes & Music Jokes)
  7. December 6th What is Rudolph’s favorite NBA basketball team?… The Milwaukee Bucks. (Christmas Jokes Wisconsin Jokes)
  8. What famous Southern Rock anthem is the same as the Boston Celtics offense during the 1980s… Free Bird.
  9. What is a basketball fan’s favorite Christmas song?… “Oh Christmas Three, Oh Christmas Three!” (Christmas Tree Jokes & Music Jokes)
  10. What is Santa’s favorite basketball team?… The New York Old St. Nicks. (NBA Jokes)
  11. Why is basketball the grossest professional sport?… Because they dribble all over the court. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  12. Who is the best choice of a musical artist to sing the National Anthem at an NBA game during the Christmas season?… A “wreath” a Franklin, (Christmas Wreath Jokes & Live NFL Performance)
  13. What New Year’s resolution should a basketball player never make?… To travel more. (Travel Guest Blogs Basketball Jokes)
  14. Why was Rudolph the Reindeer ineligible for his college basketball team?… His grade went down in history. (Reindeer Jokes & World’s Best Basketball Jokes)
  15. New Year’s Eve Jokes: What song is best for a youth basketball working on his game on New Year’s Eve?… A shot in the Dark bu Ozzy Osbourne. (365 Music Jokes)

January Jokes for Kids

  1. What New Year’s resolution should a basketball player never make?… To travel more. (Travel Guest Blogs Basketball Jokes)
  2. What did Bugs Bunny say to the Looney Tunes Squad at the New Year’s Day Practice?… Hoppy New Year!
  3. What New Year’s resolution should a high school basketball player never make?… To travel more. (Travel Guest Blogs Middle School Jokes)

March Jokes / March Madness Jokes

  1. A grandson was visiting his grandfather at the nursing home. When the boy walked into the room, the grandfather smiled. The boy enthusiastically said, “Grandpa you have March Madness teeth! You are down to your Final Four!” (Final Four Jokes & Grandparent Jokes)
  2. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Woo… Woo, who?… What are you cheering for in basketball in March Madness? (Summer Olympic Knock Knock Jokes)
  3. What did the March say to all the madness?… What’s all that bracket. (March Madness Quotes & Top 25 Jimmy V Quotes)
  4. Tom’s basketball coach has five players: four are named Koko, Momo, Lolo and Jojo. What is the fifth player’s name?… Tom.
  5. What did the march say to all the madness?… What’s all that bracket. (March Madness Quotes & Top 25 Jimmy V Quotes)
  6. March 7th Oreo Cookie Day: Why do college basketball players love Oreo cookies?… Because they can dunk them! (Oreo Cookie Jokes)
  7. March 20th World Frog Day: Why are frogs so good at basketball?… Because they always make jump shots!
  8. Why did the basketball player bring crayons to the Final Four?… He wanted to draw fouls. (Final Four Jokes)

May Jokes.

  1. National Hamburger Day: Why aren’t burgers too good at basketball?… Too many turnovers! (Hamburger Jokes)

June Jokes

  1. June 2nd National Donut Day: Which fast-food chain would be a good basketball player?… Dunkin’ Donuts. (Donut Jokes)
  2. June 4th National Cheese Day: What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops?… Swiss! (Cheese Jokes)
  3. Why is basketball the grossest youth sport?… Because they dribble all over the court. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  4. What do you call a movie about Lebron James in the NBA Finals?… The Loss of the Rings. (101 Lord of the Rings Jokes)

July Jokes

  1. What NBA player would be a great spokesperson for the 4th of July?… Enes Freedom(4th of July Jokes)

“He’s great on the court,” a sportswriter said of a college basketball player in an interview with his coach. “But’s how’s his scholastic work?” “Why, he makes straight A’s,” replied the coach. “Wonderful!” said the sportswriter. “Yes,” agreed the coach, “but his B’s are a little crooked.” (365 School Jokes)

February Jokes

  1. February 2nd: Groundhog Day: What do you call a groundhog that plays basketball?… A ball hog. (Ground Hog Day Jokes)
  2. If Shaquille O’Neal was a shade of blue he would be Shaquille O’Teal. (March Madness Jokes)
  3. February 21st National Pancake Day: Why aren’t pancakes too good at basketball?… Too many turnovers! (Hamburger Jokes)

August Jokes

  1. August 4th National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day: Why do college basketball players love Chocolate Chip cookies?… Because they can dunk them! (Oreo Cookie Jokes)
  2. August 6th National Twins Day: The Thompson Twins were an amazing musical group in the 80s. Most people don’t know they were also decent at basketball and had a sharp shooting dad. They often entered local 3 on 3 basketball tournaments and stunned opponents…. No one had an answer for the pick and pop.

September Jokes

  1. What is the #1 cereal for basketball players?… Dunkaroos. (Cereal Jokes)
  2. Why did the basketball player go to jail?…  Because he shot the ball! (Police Jokes)
  3. What legendary college basketball would be a great major league baseball pitcher?… Coach K! (Baseball Jokes)
  4. Did you know Steven Spielberg and John Williams like to play basketball together? … He shoots, he scores. (Movie Jokes & Music Jokes)
  5. Labor Day Jokes: My tennis career has taught me I can be the best basketball player ever… Nothing but net. (Tennis Jokes)
  6. They’re a basketball team in transition… They’re going from bad to worse.
  7. Why did the basketball player visit the bank?… His checks were all bouncing.
  8. What do basketball cheerleaders drink before they go to a game?… Root beer! (365 Sports Jokes & Cheerleading Jokes)
  9. What did the triangle offense say to the ball?… “You’re pointless.” (Geometry Jokes)
  10. Where do point guards take their girlfriends to dance?… Basket Balls! (Dance Jokes)
  11. What is a great warm-up song for a basketball team?… Shoot to Thrill by AC/DC. (365 Music Jokes)
  12. What do an angry bunny and NBA Dunk Contest Champions have in common?… Mad hops.
  13. Why is basketball the grossest college sport?… Because they dribble all over the court.
  14. In what sport is a basket filled but never gets full?… basketball. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  15. What kind of stories are told by college basketball players?…. Tall Tales. (Library Jokes)
  16. The blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court… The game would be canceled. (Whale Jokes)
  17. Why did the basketball player bring crayons to the game?… He wanted to draw fouls. (Final Four Jokes)
  18. What’s a pirate’s favorite college basketball team?… Seton Hall Pirates. (Pirate Jokes)
  19. September 19th National Talk Like a Pirate Day: What’s a pirate’s favorite basketball move?… Jump hook. (Pirate Jokes)
  20. Why violation do ghosts get called for the most in basketball?… Ghoul tending.
  21. Why is a baby good at basketball?… Because they’re always dribbling. (Baby Jokes)
  22. Where do basketball players get their uniforms from?… New Jersey!
  23. What has a net but can’t catch?… A basketball hoop!
  24. Why did the basketball player visit the bank?… His checks were all bouncing.
  25. The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the freshman class.  Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?”  A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, “A basketball coach?” (Psychology Jokes)
  26. The anti-vax basketball team lost every game this season…. Apparently they never take any shots. (Covid Jokes)
  27. What is a sad, sad, college basketball team?… The Duke Blue Devils. (Psychology Jokes)
  28. What’s the difference between the bad basketball player and a dollar bill?… You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
  29. What do you call a college basketball player that misses dunks?… Alley Whoops.
  30. I used to be addicted to basketball… but I rebounded.

October Jokes

  1. October 1st National Coffee Day: Why do the Lakers have to drink their coffee black?… There is no more KAREEM. (Coffee Jokes & NBA Basketball Jokes)
  2. Did you hear about the basketball team that doesn’t have a website?… They can’t string three “Ws” together. (Computer Jokes)
  3. What legendary college basketball would be the worst major league baseball hitter?… Coach K! (Baseball Jokes)
  4. October 4th National Taco Day: What basketball player would be a great spokesperson for National Taco Day?… Tacko Fall. (Taco Jokes)
  5. Basketball Jokes for Halloween: What do you call a pumpkin that can slam dunk a basketball?… Michael Gourdan (Pumpkin Jokes)
  6. Basketball Jokes for Halloween: Did you hear about the pumpkin who played basketball?… He was a point gourd. (Pumpkin Jokes)
  7. Basketball Jokes for Halloween: Why was Cinderella such a bad basketball player?… Her coach was a pumpkin. (Top Holiday Jokes & Top Halloween Jokes)
  8. What’s the first meal of the day called for basketball players?… Fast Breaks!
  9. October 9thLeif Erikson Day Jokes: Why was Leif Erikson so bad at basketball?… He was always traveling. (World Geography Jokes)
  10. October 10th Columbus Day JokesWhy was Christopher Columbus awful at basketball?… He was traveled too much. (World Geography Jokes)
  11. October 14th National Egg Day: What’s an eggs favorite basketball team?… Yokelahomia City. (Basketball Jokes & Oklahoma Jokes)
  12. I am a big Star Wars fan and LA Laker fan… I dressed up as Kobe Wan Kenobi for Halloween. (Star Wars Jokes & Obi Wan Kenobi Jokes)
  13. Why are ghost great at playing basketball defense?… They are great at getting through screens.
  14. What would you get if you crossed a basketball and the Invisible Man?… Skills like no one has ever seen. 
  15. Playing basketball with vampires is tough… No Blood! No Foul!
  16. Why did the Harlem Globetrotters have a ghost on their team?… To add a little team spirit. 
  17. Why was Dracula get a technical foul?…He was a pain in the neck! (Top Baseball Jokes: Page #1 Google Search)
  18. Did you hear about the Ghost basketball team?… They can’t shoot or defend, but the have a lot of spirit.
  19. What do you get when you cross a basketball player with a monster?… a double header! 
  20. Why was Dracula on the 15-day disabled list?…He was a pain in the neck! (Top Baseball Jokes: Page #1 Google Search)
  21. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe play basketball on Halloween? (Canoe Jokes)
  22. Why was Dracula ejected from the basketball game?… He was a pain in the neck! (Top Baseball Jokes: Page #1 Google Search)
  23. Why was the mummy sent into the basketball game as the 6th man?… Because the coach knew, once he sent the mummy in the game would be all wrapped up. 
  24. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe dress up as a basketball player for Halloween? (Canoe Jokes)
  25. Orange you pumped for Halloween Basketball Jokes? (Crayon Jokes)
  26. What do you call a pumpkin that can slam dunk a basketball?… Michael Gourdan (Pumpkin Jokes)
  27. What do you call an athletic pumpkin?… A jock o’ lantern.
  28. Did you hear about the pumpkin who played basketball?… He was a point gourd. (Pumpkin Jokes)
  29. Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the basketball game?… Because he had no body to go with.
  30. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe dress up as a basketball for Halloween? (Canoe Jokes)
  31. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe dress up as a basketball coach for Halloween? (Canoe Jokes)

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