101 College Basketball Jokes

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  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best college basketball jokes.
  2. March Madness 1983: How would you describe NC State’s last second play to beat the University of Houston in 1983?… Alley Whoooooooooooops! (North Carolina Jokes & Texas Jokes)
  3. “We have a great bunch of outside shooters; unfortunately, all our games are played indoors.” Weldon Drew (New Mexico Jokes)
  4. “I told one player, ‘Son, I can’t understand it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.’” Frank Layden (Grammar Jokes & New York Jokes)
  5. What is the secret to winning a National Basketball Championship? “The secret is to have eight great players, and four others who will cheer like crazy.” Jerry Tarkanian (Final Four Jokes & Nevada Jokes)
  6. A grandson was visiting his grandfather at the nursing home. When the boy walked into the room, the grandfather smiled. The boy enthusiastically said, “Grandpa you have March Madness teeth! You are down to your Final Four!” (Final Four Jokes / Grandparent Jokes / Dentist Jokes)
  7. “All I know is, as long as I led the Southeastern Conference in scoring, my grades would be fine.” Charles Barkley (Alabama Jokes)
  8. March Madness 2022: An Angel Came to Coach Calipari: Coach I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is when it is all said and done, despite a few NCAA violations, you are going to heaven. The bad news is you will have to face St. Peter again. (Cemetery Jokes & Kentucky Jokes)
  9. What is a heart surgeon’s favorite college basketball team of all time?… 1983 N.C. State NCAA Champions – the Cardiac Pack.
  10. March Madness 2023: Some people describe the historic 2023 Final Four as wonderful?… I would describe it as “ONE” derless.
  11. March Madness 2024 Jokes: How did the Alabama equipment manager clean the basketball uniforms before the 1st trip to the Final Four in 2024?… With “Roll Tide.”
  12. What college basketball team is the favorite of Dr. Seuss?… The Indiana “Who” siers. (Dr. Seuss Jokes & Indiana Jokes)
  13. March Madness 2023: How did the #1 Purdue fans react to the loss to #16 Fairleigh Dickinson? … They were boiling mad. (New Jersey Jokes & Indiana Jokes)
  14. March Madness 1979: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the most viewed NCAA Championship game?… Larry Bird, Indiana State vs. Magic Johnson, Michigan State (Canoe Jokes)
  15. March Madness 1983: What did the announcer say when Clyde Drexler picked up his 4th foul in the Championship game?… Houston, we have a problem. (Texas Jokes)
  16. If “Pistol” Pete Maravich played in March Madness today… he would get a sweet NIL deal from the NRA.
  17. March Madness 1979 How did Michigan State defeat the Sycamores of Indiana State in the 1979 Championship game?… It was Magic.
  18. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Did you hear about Hunter Dickson’s NIL deal… he will be a spokesman for the NRA.
  19. Why is North Carolina always one of the top college basketball programs?… They always dig their heels in on defense. (North Carolina Jokes)
  20. Who is a florist’s favorite March Madness player of all-time?… Jalen Rose of the Fab 5. (Flower Jokes & Michigan Jokes)
  21. Why did the college basketball player take an art class?… Because he wanted to learn how to draw fouls!
  22. When Austin Peay University had a player named Fly Williams, the students would chant, “The Fly is open! Let’s go Peay!” (Tennessee Jokes
  23. March Madness 2024 Jokes: What was the #1 watched show on TV Land during the Women’s Final Four in Cleveland in 2024?… MASH, the fans love Hawkeye.
  24. March Madness 1979: Who is the Audubon’s Society’s favorite Final Four Player of all-time?… Larry Bird. (Bird Jokes & Indiana Jokes)
  25. Duke fans have trouble spelling “Krzyzewski.” UNC fans have trouble spelling “Williams.” (Grammar Jokes & North Carolina Jokes)
  26. What college basketball Hall of Fame coach would be a great school administrator…. Dean Smith (North Carolina Jokes)
  27. Grandfather: Bet I can tell you the score before the game starts! Grandson: No Way! Grandfather: 0-0. (Final Four Jokes & Grandparent Jokes)
  28. What did the March say to all the madness?… What’s all that bracket. (March Jokes)
  29. What do you call an Alaskan in a Final Four basketball game?… A referee.
  30. What schools are part of the Crayola March Madness?… Brown University, Creighton Bluejays Butler Blue mascot, Duke Blue Devils, Harvard Crimson, Tulane Green Wave.
  31. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Did you hear about Hunter Dickson’s possible NIL deals… it is between Cabela’s and Bass Pro Shops.
  32. What did Delaware to the college basketball game?… Idaho, Alaska. Maybe her New Jersey. (Top 50 State Jokes & Basketball Jokes)
  33. Wolf Moon Jokes: NC State Basketball… The unofficial college basketball team of the Wolf Moon.
  34. March Madness 2024 Jokes: How did Yale knock of Kentucky in the 1st round?… It is not the size of the dog in the fight, it is the size of the fight in the dog.
  35. March Madness 2024 Jokes: What did the announcer say when Naismith College Player of the Year Finalist, Jamal Shead, went down with an injury?… “Houston, we have a problem.”
  36. March Madness 2023: How did #16 Fairleigh Dickinson upset #1 Purdue?… Not really sure. I guess it just was their knight. (Knight Jokes & New Jersey Jokes)
  37. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Why didn’t #12 Grand Canyon University knock of #4 Alabama to advance to the Sweet 16?… The talent gap was too wide.
  38. March Madness 2024 Jokes: How did UConn make it to the 2024 Final Four?… They played defense like dogs. (Dog Jokes)
  39. Why did the college basketball player get a job at the bakery?… He wanted to create more turnovers.
  40. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Is it weird the James Madison Dukes played Duke?
  41. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Who are the ghosts cheering for in the 2024 March Madness?… Northwestern. They love Boo Buie.
  42. Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the college basketball game?… Because he had no body to go with.
  43. Why did the basketball player go to jail?… Because he was bouncing checks!
  44. What do you call it when the Cinderella team busts your bracket?… March Sadness! (Cinderella Jokes)
  45. The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the freshman class.  Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?”  A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, “A March Madness basketball coach?” (Final Four Jokes & Grandparent Jokes)
  46. What do you call it when your team loses in the NCAA tournament?… March Sadness! (Cinderella Jokes)
  47. Why do Elite Eight fans only play 14 holes of golf?… Because they can’t make it to the Final Four. (Golf Jokes & Final Four Jokes)
  48. Basketball coaches have really focused on “Stop the Steal” since it was introduced in 2016… They really value limiting turnovers and ball security. (Election Jokes)
  49. March Madness 2024 Jokes: What 2024 March Madness fans need an XXL size hat?… More head State. (Hat Jokes)
  50. “He’s great on the court,” a sportswriter said of a college basketball player in an interview with his coach. “But’s how’s his scholastic work?” “Why, he makes straight A’s,” replied the coach. “Wonderful!” said the sportswriter. “Yes,” agreed the coach, “but his B’s are a little crooked.” (Grammar Jokes)
  51. What do March Madness basketball cheerleaders drink before they go to a basketball game?… Root beer! (Cheerleading Jokes)
  52. March Madness 2024 Jokes: What 2024 Final Four basketball was invited to the prom?… NC State. They have two DJs. DJ Horne and DJ Burns Jr. (Prom Jokes)
  53. They’re a team in transition… They’re going from bad to worse.
  54. Where does the NCAA buy March Madness basketball uniforms?… New Jersey. (New Jersey Jokes)
  55. March Madness 2024 Jokes: What was the #1 drink in Phoneix, Arizona during 2024 Final Four Weekend?… The Boilermaker, in honor of Zach Edey and Purdue.
  56. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Who did the Alaskan Iditarod team cheer for in the 2024 NCAA March Madness?… The UConn Huskies. (2023 March Madness Jokes)
  57. March Madness 2023: Did you know the Netherlands set a viewing record for watching the Final Four in 2023… Their favorite team is San Diego State coached by Brian “Dutch” er. (World Geography Jokes & California Jokes)
  58. What do you call a University of Arkansas basketball player who never passes the basketball?… A ball hog. (Arkansas Jokes)
  59. March Madness 2024 Jokes: What is Caitlin Clark’s #1 TV show?… MASH, she loves Hawkeye.
  60. March Madness 1979: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the NBA Legends who competed against each other for the 1st time in the 1979 NCAA Championship Game?… Larry Bird, Indiana State & Magic Johnson, Michigan State (Canoe Jokes)
  61. Sports Reporter: What do you think about the execution of your team? Frustrated losing March Madness coach: I support that 100%!
  62. How did Alabama get the to the 2024 Final Four in Arizona?… They rolled on in!
  63. 2021 March Madness Jokes: Who had Oral Roberts advancing in their March Madness bracket?… The American Dental Association! (Dentist Jokes & Oklahoma Jokes)
  64. What is the unofficial candy bar of the NCAA basketball tournament?… Fast break. (Final Four Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  65. What do you call the NCAA tourney when your #1 seed loses to a #16 seed?… March Sadness. (Psychology Jokes)
  66. “No, but they gave one to me anyway.” – L.A. Lakers rookie Elden Campbell when asked if he earned a degree at Clemson University (College Jokes & California Jokes)
  67. What do you call it when the Cinderella team busts your bracket?… March Sadness! (Cinderella Jokes)
  68. What do you call it when your team loses in the NCAA tournament?… March Sadness! (Cinderella Jokes)
  69. March Madness 1983: What did the announcer say when looking at the Houston Cougars started missing free throws at the end of the championship game?… Houston, we have a problem. (Texas Jokes)
  70. What do you call the NCAA tourney when your #1 seed loses to a #16 seed?… March Sadness. (Psychology Jokes)
  71. Why did the March Madness basketball player go to jail?…  Because he shot the ball! (Police Jokes)
  72. March Madness 2024 Jokes: How did North Carolina beat Michigan State to advance to the Sweet 16?… They dug their Tar Heels” on defense.
  73. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Which Final Four locker room has the best music?… NC State. They have two DJs on the team. DJ Horne and DJ Burns Jr. (365 Music Jokes)
  74. “The best thing about freshmen is they become sophomores.” (Not always true anymore!) Al McGuire Marquette Basketball Coach (Michigan Jokes)
  75. March Madness 2024 Jokes: How did Clemson knock of Baylor to advance to the Sweet 16?… The scratched and clawed.
  76. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Who is a lumberjack’s favorite March Madness player?… Kansas guard Nick “Timber” lake.  (Kansas Jokes)
  77. March Madness 2024 Jokes: What 2024 Final Four basketball was invited to the homecoming dance?… NC State. They have two DJs. DJ Horne and DJ Burns Jr. (Prom Jokes)
  78. What would be a great Final Four warm-up song?… (W)hoo(m)p! (There It Is) by Tag Team. (365 Music Jokes)
  79. March Madness 2023: How did the #15 Princeton Tigers get to the Sweet 16 beating #2 Arizona and #7 Missouri?… They scratched and clawed. (New Jersey Jokes)
  80. What does a March Madness basketball player say when he misses?… Shoot.
  81. Why didn’t the struggling NCAA basketball team have a website?… They can’t string three W’s together. (Computer Jokes)
  82. Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?… She ran away from the ball. (Cinderella Jokes)
  83. What do you call an unbelievable story about a basketball team’s underdog win in the Final Four?… A tall tale. (Book Jokes)
  84. March Madness 2024 Jokes: What song was playing in the streets of Grambling, Louisiana after the First Four victory in 2024?… “Grambling on” by Led Zeppelin. (365 Music Jokes & Louisiana Jokes)
  85. March Madness 1979: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the NBA Hall of Famer who went 33 – 1, losing the NCAA Championship Game?… Larry Bird, Indiana State (Canoe Jokes)
  86. March Madness 2024 Jokes: Who do skiers cheer for during the 2024 March Madness?… The UConn Hu skies. (Dog Jokes & March Madness Jokes)
  87. March Madness 2023: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the programs that appeared in their 1st Final Four in 2023? (Canoe Jokes)
  88. “When Xavier McDaniel plays against Orlando Wooldridge, it’s a coach’s dream – X vs O.” Mychal Thompson
  89. March Madness 2023: In the post-game interview, Coach Tobin Anderson was asked, how come you were not able to continue the Cinderella story and knock off FAU?… Not really sure. We worked our tails off. I guess it just wasn’t our knight. (Knight Jokes & New Jersey Jokes)
  90. March Madness 2023: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the coach who appeared in his 1st Final Four in his first season as a Division I college coach in 2023? (Canoe Jokes)
  91. Why did the March Madness college basketball player sign up for the arts & crafts class?… He wanted to learn how to make baskets! (Art Jokes)
  92. Why doesn’t BYU want to be this year’s Cinderella team?… Because the school considers the movie to be inappropriate. (Movie Jokes / Disney Jokes / Cinderella Jokes / Utah Jokes)
  93. The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the freshman class.  Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?”  A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, “A Final Four basketball coach?” (Final Four Jokes & Grandparent Jokes)
  94. Where do college basketball players always get their coffee?… Dunkin’ Donuts! (Donut Jokes & Coffee Jokes)
  95. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about March Madness?
  96. Hanging in the hallway at the college are the basketball team pictures from the past 40 years. A player in the center of the front row in each picture holds a basketball identifying the year — “62-63,” “63-64,” “64-65,” etc.  One day I spotted a freshman looking curiously at the photos. Turning to me, he said, “Isn’t it strange how the teams always lost by one point?” (College Jokes)
  97. Did you know many people in the Netherlands follow March Madness… Their favorite team is San Diego State coached by Brian “Dutch” er. (World Geography Jokes & California Jokes)
  98. What’s the difference between a dog and a basketball player?… One drools, the other dribbles. (Dog Jokes)
  99. What do you call the NCAA tourney when your #2 seed loses to a #15 seed?… March Sadness. (Psychology Jokes)
  100. “I’m a coach who believes in execution. Whenever I see [that player] shoot free throws, I want to execute him.” Rick Pitino(New York Jokes)
  101. What do you call the NCAA tourney when your #3 seed loses to a #14 seed?… March Sadness. (Psychology Jokes)